So many events have happened in my life in less than a year that I’m still in amazement that I have made it this far. Happier days this time I scribe on.
It is not a right to pass from one phase into the next
It is not that of our own direction to transform from that we wish
To that we deem we must be
We are far from the cellulose that we drop off at the local CVS to process
We are complex
Yet simple
Yet it sometimes takes that monumental event
Before the effectuātus evolution of our mundane existence
Comes to pass
I looked at what U could do for me before I asked what I could do for U
I said ok without listening to the question
I moved forward without hearing the command of reverse
I made circles in the sand when U asked for a straight line
I screamed in my own anguish at my frustration I blamed on U
Yet my feeble mind failed to realize that proliferation to my anger
Was that cause by me
So I ran
Running from the truth
Not willing to see the trees for the forest
Because I had planted the same demons that I felt rooting in my soul
Realizing how depleted I had become
I ran so far and long that I couldn’t remember
why I started running in the first place
I got so tired that all I could do is kneel
As I knelt down
I prayed
And my entire existence came crashing down on me
I felt cold
I felt weak
I started shaking and crying like the heavenly father had laid his hands on me
An angel knelt beside me and said
“ Take what U feel and express it as U always have”
I realized then that I was running from myself
I now love those around me and feel no malice toward those who choose not to love me back
For they too must ask themselves what they are running form
‘cause I only run to the love that HE is guiding me to
We must choose the quest by which we will be defined
Life is only a formality
